CRF

3 days and still no news from the vet on Poppy's urine test.

Y told me that god needs Poppy more than me.
That's why he's going to take Poppy away earlier than usual.
Because Chronic Renal Failure (CRF) is more prevalent to older cats.
Poppy's 4 years old only.
I have been searching for answers without even realizing that crucial answers are in front of me.
In the form of my colleague.
She has had a cat who passed away from CRF.
Till the day he died, he was a fat orange cat, very pampered and well loved.
I cried the day she texted me and told me that Ommi passed away and how he looked so peaceful.
I would cry for all animals.
Once I feel stronger, I would talk to her.

But for now, I found a bit of solace in Helen's website on CRF.
http://www.felinecrf.org
It's so informative, it is a wonder why I did not find this site earlier.
Helen lost her two cats, Tanya and Thomas to CRF and has dedicated her time to publish this site that is so informative, it makes your head spin.
And she is not a vet. Just a person who loved and lost 2 cats and wanted to help others by writing about her experience and all the knowledge she has gathered over the years, coping with CRF.
I find the part on Success Stories being the most inspiring.
http://www.felinecrf.org/success_stories.htm
It gave me a sliver of hope that maybe it is not going to be so bad afterall....
Maybe. No one knows.
But knowledge is power and the more I understand about the situation, the more I am able to cope and possibly allow Poppy to live longer, as comfortably as he can.
The most inspiring stories are the ones that the vet would say that there is no hope and there is only a week left but the cat went on and live for 3 - 5 years.
One was diagnosed at the age of 16 but lived till 22.
So, there is hope.
Just because someone says Poppy won't be around for long, I should not just resign to the idea that he's going to go soon.
But of course it doesn't stop me from feeling sad and tearful.

If Poppy's willing to fight, I will too.
God is not going to take him away from this mummy so easily.
Cos I need Poppy more.
Never underestimate the love of a mom for her baby.
The worst thing someone could say to me is that it's ok, I still have MeowMeow.
Both are just as precious.
I mean, you won't say that to a person if she was going to lose one of her human baby right - it's ok, you still have your other child.
Like what Tybalt said, just because my baby has paws and fur, it doesn't make him less important.
I fought tooth and nail to nurse MeowMeow back to health from his car accident.
3 months of visiting him at the vet almost everyday, talking, stroking him to bring his spirit up.
Another 3 -4 months nursing him at home, spoon feeding him wet food everyday and cleaning up after him.
All the while coping with a demanding career and the exhaustion of it all.
If the vet could, he would have chopped off MeowMeow's leg as it was just hanging there, held by a few pieces of muscle.
Vets could sometimes be wrong.
MeowMeow had a successful surgery and beat all odds - he can jump, run, even scratch his itchy neck with his 'broken' leg.

Now, I will fight for Poppy.
I will not give up until the day I need to.

Even if it means I have to wake up earlier to tend to Poppy, or sleep later, by all means.
Even if it means going to the vet almost every week, so be it.
Even if it means I look like shit with my tired face - bring it on.
So god, I won't let u have Poppy without a fight.

For those who want to know more on CRF, please visit Helen's site.
Knowledge is power.